Contrary to popular belief, I'm dating Peter Parker.
I'm on an online dating site and this just happened.
HIM: You are so sexy. Do you like to give or receive massages? - Jay
ME: I cannot bear to talk to someone who on initial conversation asks if I like to give or receive massages. Thanks for the flattering remark, Jay, but I'm not interested.
I wanted to say.. HEY JAY, YOU'RE 29 AND THIS IS WHY YOU'RE NOT WITH ANYONE, YA SKID.
  4 notes  1 month ago
  1. lionsmakeyou said: Plenty of Fish is the best. Every subject line is “Hey” and every message reads “YOUR cute”. FUCK THE FUCKK OFF. Long live the Matty.
  2. cheerupcharlie posted this
cellar door by coryjohnny for tumblr.